walkingshadow: anne taintor. it's not easy being easy. (dave barry explains it all)
a. in the absence of an actual job, my dad has proposed that he give me money for essentially acting as his secretary. he has ten years of piles of paper—bills, building plans, receipts, annual reports, business cards—and his least favorite chore in the world is sorting through and organizing it all. the paper trail has spilled over into at least four rooms in this house, and his attempt to consolidate it all into one room has been half-hearted at best and unsuccessful at worst. so, in exchange for setting up a filing system—and if you could see my hard drive, you would know how much i adore folders within folders—and paying the household bills, i am taking the money and running.

b. year 22, month 9, day 11 (toby: there was that time i was in elementary school) of career search: STILL NO PLAN. my mother actually asked the other day where i saw myself in five or ten years, and i didn't laugh in her face OR burst into tears, but i did have to quickly leave the room. honestly? i'm peter from office space. given the choice, i would do nothing.

c. [livejournal.com profile] gjstruthseeker would like for me to roadtrip it up to gainesville this week, and i would like to go. the lack of a car puts a little crimp in this plan, but i'm going to see what i can do. i hear the weather is lovely this time of year!

d. speaking of lovely weather in places that aren't south florida: who would like a scarf? if you would like one, i would love to make you one. for testimonials i suppose you can refer to [livejournal.com profile] gjstruthseeker, [livejournal.com profile] zeplum, [livejournal.com profile] vongroovy, [livejournal.com profile] silentfire, or [livejournal.com profile] malelia_honu, all of whom got scarves last year that (they said) they liked. i owe [livejournal.com profile] isilya, but she's told me to hold off on sending anything until her living arrangements are settled (at which point she will apparently need plenty of warm-weather gear and accessories, as she has mentioned there may be things like chilblains in her future o.O); i just finished another one for mal and am about to start a new one for erika, but other than that i have no commissions and i'm in the mood. so let me know.

e. on saturday my dad woke me up at about one in the afternoon to ask if i was interested in going to an art fair. we ended up spending a couple of hours in the late afternoon at art in the park in the city of plantation, which turned out to be the perfect amount of time. it's a relatively small park and a correspondingly small fair, so we got to see just about everything, but without that eventual glazed and impenetrable feeling of supersaturation that always hits me at the end of a day at the museum or a bigger festival like coconut grove. my dad bought me two prints and an arepa.

f. lists are my new favorite thing. honestly, i don't remember how to write a livejournal entry anymore.

g. [livejournal.com profile] malelia_honu and i finally got to see RENT ) we went late on a wednesday night and were the only people in the theater. go us.

h. the other day [livejournal.com profile] cimorene111 posted a glowing rec for christmastime in the city, a CSI:NY story (mac/danny) by [livejournal.com profile] stellaluna_, and i thought to myself, "score!" because i once saw an episode of CSI:NY, and that's all the qualification i need these days to feel myself up to the task of reading in any given fandom. lacking that, a primer will suffice—pictures are a bonus, but not strictly required. so i read this story, and it was fantastic, and then i followed the link back to her [livejournal.com profile] fanfic100 table and read all of the stories she had listed there; and THEN i settled down in earnest with her webspace and her livejournal memories and burned through her entire oeuvre. i ended with the light from a dying star series, which is this dark and drowning work of beauty that feels like taking a bat to a windshield, because they keep breaking and breaking, but they never shatter.

i. saturday night cousin m. and i ate more sushi and worked our way through disc 3 of boomtown. the more i see of this show the more i fall in love, and the sadder i am that this single season is all we'll ever have. this is a show that cared deeply about continuity and quality, that expected a lot of its audience, and then rewarded them. the A, B, C, D, and E plots all interconnect and serve a purpose—a unified purpose. everything works in support of the plot and themes of the episode and futher character development; everything they do reinforces what we've seen and then tells us something new.

on the how-much-do-we-know-about-our-crimefighters? spectrum, boomtown falls a lot closer to NYPD blue than law & order, but everything's a slow reveal. they definitely control the narrative. and i like these people. they're good people. cutting for, um, spoilers? because somebody someday might watch this show )

j. i don't talk much about NCIS, but i love it. it's got great banter and the adorably grumpy mark harmon. actually i like all the characters, even zeva; i'm not crazy about the director, but i am pretty crazy about abby and ducky, and even tony in his own smarmy, approval-seeking way. i don't talk about it much because half the time i forget to watch it, and i'm not particularly fannish about it—though i did read all the recs from the last polyamorous update.

k. catch-up: i'm two weeks behind on house, but i do have them on tape; i'm *three* weeks behind on SGA, but [livejournal.com profile] gjstruthseeker sent me "epiphany" and "critical mass" in the mail, and i'm downloading "grace under pressure" piecemeal from [livejournal.com profile] oxoniensis right now, so one day i won't have to press my sad little nose up against the glass and stare longingly at everyone's freaking cut tags anymore.

l. grey's anatomy )

m. if there's anyone within lj-shot who hasn't downloaded both rumble by [livejournal.com profile] shalott and [livejournal.com profile] cesperanza and welcome home by [livejournal.com profile] permetaform, for the love of god, please do that right now. no passing go, no two hundred dollars, etc. the first is HILARIOUS, seriously, seriously hilarious. i'm going to call these spoilers, because it's just so much better if you don't know what it's about until it's happening ) and [livejournal.com profile] permetaform's vid is this gorgeous look at elizabeth and atlantis set to this equally unbelievably gorgeous music, and i keep abusing adjectives, but it's BEAUTIFUL and the story it tells is amazing.

n. site-src: museum of media history: in the year 2014, the new york times has gone offline. the fourth estate's fortunes have waned. what happened to the news? and what is EPIC?

o. next time: ALL THE WAY THROUGH THE ALPHABET. *facepalm*
walkingshadow: anne taintor. it's not easy being easy. (classically trained to give up)
a. baby's first jury summons! it's for federal court; my term of service is two weeks, on telephone standby, beginning january 9th. on one hand there's the dorky thrill of THE SIXTH AMENDMENT and CIVIC DUTY; on the other there's bureaucratic shenanigans starting at eight a.m.; also the ominous creakings of the criminal justice system.

b. i have seven library books currently checked out, but all i want to read right now is the golden compass (first in the his dark materials trilogy), the book that WILL NOT COME.

c. the other day i saw shopgirl with [livejournal.com profile] malelia_honu and her mom. thoughts )

d. there are memes sweeping through my flist that i'm really enjoying reading but have zero intention of participating in myself, because 1) i am—what's the opposite of intimidating? and 2) when it comes to things i assume you know or think you should know about me, i have trouble coming up with two things to rub together. if anyone has any questions, you are more than welcome to ask.

e. i am embarking on a personal feedback project. it might take a while for anyone to notice this, but everything i read and enjoy from now on will be feedbacked, and also i will retroactively feedback most if not all of what i have saved to disk. oh, yes.

here's the thing: for several years i've been not so much lurking on the fringes of fandom as hiding out in the subspace of fandom. social contact makes me nervous, breaking into established social networks makes me want to panic, and when i say i have trouble making overtures, i don't just mean that i couldn't visit a professor at his or her office hours unless mandated or i'd just slept through a midterm, i mean i couldn't call my therapist back. i acquit myself very nicely when actually with people, and i'm thrilled when people approach *me*, but my first instinct is never to initiate. there, that's probably at least one thing you should know about me.

i'm embracing the fandom thing though. i love it here. you are all awesome. and when you say interesting things and write beautiful stories, i don't just feel an obligation to tell you, i want to tell you. it's going to be slow going at first, because first i have to panic over each one, and then i have to articulate exactly what to say; in general i don't like just leaving i loved this! unless it's a particularly short and fluffy thing, because i'd much rather give back the effort a writer put into writing—that is, whatever i got out of the story, i want you to know exactly what it was, what my favorite parts were, what i found particularly effective. it's going to get easier, because things always do.

f. bellsouth called the other day to tell us DSL would be available in our area in two weeks time, O FRABJOUS, FRABJOUS DAY. i would dearly love to upload lots and lots of music for you all, plus i cannot WAIT to download episodes of this cheesy sci-fi show, for the love of god.

g. over thanksgiving my brother m. sat me down in front of the internets and forced me to search through job listings on monster.com and also to tell him—wait for it—what i would like to do for the rest of my life. on a whim we requested a brochure from ITT technical institute, because i told him that if i had college to do all over again, i'd go in for web design (also i would set my sights on a much smaller school in a much larger city, but that's another story). a friendly man named joe has since called me twice, and sent me email once, urging me to contact him so he can give me a campus tour and more information. he sounds so sweet.

h. hey, television. arrested development and kitchen confidential were hilarious last night. HILARIOUS. are they actually being cancelled? do we know for SURE?

grey's anatomy )
walkingshadow: anne taintor. it's not easy being easy. (we're in a road movie to berlin)
hey, remember thanksgiving? i don't know if everyone else's attention span is contracting like a puddle on a sunny day, but mine sure is! already thanksgiving has faded into the fuzzy past; it could have been years ago. but we had thanksgiving, thanksgiving was lovely. and by "thanksgiving" i mean the extended holiday weekend remix stretching from tuesday night to sunday night. during which time there were eight family members in town, plus [livejournal.com profile] gjstruthseeker who i hadn't seen in AGES; and we used all the bedding in the house putting everyone up, and we ate, seriously, SO MUCH FOOD. do you want to know what we ate? oh my god, if you care, i will tell you:

in which we did nothing for six days but eat and cook and then eat what we'd cooked and sometimes ate what other people had cooked for us )

in the odd moments when we weren't eating we were being entertained by my two and a half year old nephew (extremely vocal, extremely energetic, extremely bossy, so cute); catching up with each other; reading—we firmly believe that the family that reads together stays together. at one point there were five or six of us spread out in the living room with our respective books; i managed to finish the man who mistook his wife for a hat, but much more on that later.

on friday we saw the ice harvest )

[livejournal.com profile] gjstruthseeker and i managed to watch most of season one stargate: atlantis, but there is much, MUCH more on that to come. we were up until five a.m. on saturday night but we still had to skip a couple of episodes and we didn't make it to "the siege," part II; though i did make sure we saw "trinity" before she left on sunday morning. we had some technical difficulties and some platform incompatabilities which means she'd downloaded "the hive" but couldn't transfer it to me by hook or crook; it's hopefully in the mail. i have a folder of episode reactions and spoiler-ridden fic on my desktop, and i created another one last night labeled post-EPIPHANY *cries*. i love everyone and their cut tags. you are all beautiful.

between thanksgiving and tai chi i'm two weeks behind on house; i did see grey's anatomy on sunday ) where can i get a grey's anatomy icon or three?
walkingshadow: anne taintor. it's not easy being easy. (they ought to drown him in holy water)
a. the other day—one of those days when there was no power and i went wandering around the house pining for just one rumor on any internet—i had this horrible idea for a livejournal community: a character manifesto community, along the lines of [livejournal.com profile] ship_manifesto. it was inspired by the fact that i adore lt. col. john sheppard of the cheesy show stargate: atlantis beyond all reason and, likely, all rational thought; and yet there are many people who either 1) are perfectly ambivalent toward him, or 2) hate him, everything he does, and everything he stands for. and not only would i love to spread the gospel of john sheppard in a forum that forces me to use examples and reasoning and sentences that don't include the symbols "<" and "3" and "!" repeatedly in conjunction with each other; i would love to read through somebody else's evidence stack for all their grievances against him.

likewise for someone like elizabeth, whom i hate: the urge to smash her face in every time she opens her mouth grows stronger with every episode, and i suppose i could marshal my arguments and articulate all the things she does that are patronizing and ineffectual and STUPID—but i also know there are people out there who are elizabeth FANS, and i ask, "dear god, WHY?" in all seriousness. i would like to know what they see.

please now tell me all the reasons why we should never speak of this again.

b. dear [livejournal.com profile] gjstruthseeker and [livejournal.com profile] silentfire,

thanks to [livejournal.com profile] malelia_honu's faithful listening habits, she was able to tell me—and i am able to tell you—to listen to this week's broadcast of wait, wait . . . don't tell me!, specifically the listener limerick challenge segment beginning at 10:57. you will be rewarded! or possibly you will suffer post-traumatic flashbacks! but nobody likes to suffer alone.

c. on friday [livejournal.com profile] malelia_honu and i ventured out into the world to see prime )

on the way out of the theater we made frustrated motions at the starbucks next door that was just closing up for the night. i don't understand why cafés and coffee bars that are located very close to movie theaters don't make it a point to be open for at least an hour after the last movie is over. mal and i don't even like starbucks coffee, but they were right there, and we would have paid good money for their brewed or baked goods and then sat in their establishment for an hour or so, playing cards or talking about the movie or whatever. don't people do that? instead, nobody got our business, and we came back to my house and played a rousing game of scrabble!

d. yesterday my parents went driving up and down the turnpike all day to attend first the services and then the party for the bat mitzvah of a cousin on my dad's side. "have fun!" i said. i wasn't even invited, but i was more relieved than miffed—these aren't the nice cousins. i went over to cousin m.'s house to watch an episode of boomtown and play with the kittens; then we went downtown for thai food; and then we came back and watched the next three episodes and played with the kittens some more. cousin m. slept through the middle of episode three, but she thinks i didn't notice, so that's okay.

boomtown was a television show that premiered in 2002: nobody watched it; NBC beat it into the ground with sad scheduling and eventually cancelled it early in its second season. i can see why. not because it's a bad show—dozens of bad shows are renewed every year, i haven't figured out why—and not just because it was a really, really good show (which it was), because evidence has shown that really good shows can achieve critical acclaim and popular support, though not as often as one could hope.

its downfall was that it makes you WORK. my parents asked me what it was about, and i thought for a minute before telling them it was centered around crime, because it's not exactly a crime drama, or a legal drama, or a medical and emergency-rescue drama—but it's centered around a crime, and in the course of an episode we get the story of that crime from the points of view of all the regular characters, plus the relevant players that week, e.g. the perpetrators or victims or the relatives and accomplices thereof. the regular characters include two police officers, two detectives (one of whom is played by donnie wahlberg, and i wish i were more fluently versed in pop culture so i could fully appreciate just how funny i suspect that is), a deputy district attorney, a reporter, and a paramedic. their lives are all intertwined, and they all have their own problems, which are revealed slowly and not necessarily chronologically. it's not the kind of show you can put on while you're doing your homework or the dishes, and it's not the kind of show you can pick up mid-season; it's not even the kind of show you can miss an episode or two of without getting completely lost. i think if you missed the pilot, it was already too late. it was an intricately thought-out and beautifully put-together show, and i am completely unsurprised that it didn't make it on weekly network television. it did last a full season though, so at least we have that.

e. the library called on friday to tell me i had items ready for pick-up! which i then dutifully trotted over and picked up. one of the items was the complete first series of the office. we watched the first episode during dinner, and i don't know yet if i'm more amused than horrified or vice-versa. there are more items for the picking-up tomorrow, so i ought to at least get started on paul erdős's biography. cousin m. loaned me her complete chronicles of narnia, and i mean to re-read the lion, the witch, and the wardrobe before the movie comes out; and my mom just handed me the no. 1 ladies' detective agency, which the plain dealer called "one of the best, most charming, honest, hilarious and life-affirming books to appear in years," and my mother thought it was decent, so that's on the pile too.

f. my mom and i went grocery shopping today, and in the produce section by the orange juice we ran into an old family friend, a woman who worked with my mom and whose oldest daughter is my age, though we were never terribly good friends. her youngest daughter (a junior in high school) is apparently having trouble keeping her grades up; the mom asked, not exactly seriously, i don't think, if i tutored: "AP statistics," she asked? and i said i never took statistics, that was the one thing i couldn't help with; but pre-calc i could probably do, and when she asked about "AP english with a wacky teacher?" i said, "AHAHAHA, AP ENGLISH WITH A WACKY TEACHER IS MY SPECIALTY." the caps-lock was mostly in my head. mostly.

that, of course, spurred my mother to later broach the topic of grad school and whether i'd been doing any thinking about it, a conversation from which i had to run away and hide.

g. grey's anatomy )

h. be honest: how many of you filled out jason's nerd search?
walkingshadow: anne taintor. it's not easy being easy. (the future freaks me out)
a. oh man, this is so late, but: a happy and healthy new year to everyone celebrating the new year! in my house we cooked all day for company (only cousin m. and my aunt and uncle this year) for dinner on both nights of rosh hashanah; my aunt had break fast and did it strangely, as we all knew she would but always hope she won't.

my mom and i sat out synagogue this year: she was deeply unhappy with the rabbi and cantor at our old temple and left several years ago; she has yet to find another one that makes her feel satisfied and welcome. my dad tried to guilt me into going with him, but it didn't take. instead i did some navel-gazing of the "i have basically rejected the religion of my childhood, yet at the same time would like not to reject the culture outright or the family traditions entailed therein" variety. you know, like you do. )

b. went with cousin m. to the humane society on two separate occasions this past week to pick out cats for her to take home and love forever and ever. it's a good thing i was expressly forbidden to bring home any kittens myself, because KITTENS. cousin m. took a whole lot longer than i would have to make up her mind, but in the end came away with littermates: two male grey tiger kittens, two months old, who are friendly and playful and curious and, you know, adorable. she picked them up yesterday and took today off from work to make sure they wouldn't get lost in her house or anything. she referred to it as maternity leave.

c. the other day my mom asked me about things like application deadlines and whether i really wanted to go to grad school, etc.: it's not her fault that career talk + pms = a one-way ticket to crying jag town.

i've reluctantly agreed that there's no real point in going to grad school if i don't really know what i want to do. i am so, so tempted to write to my cambridge shakespeare professor and ask him if he was really serious when he said he wished i were his student and suggested i consider cambridge for graduate school, or if he was just toying with my fragile emotions. because it was obviously something i was good at and would probably enjoy doing. it would be something to do: reading for a graduate degree in shakespeare. in cambridge. i would explode, you know?

also there is the part where i want a ph.d. JUST BECAUSE. the other day i couldn't figure out how to properly abbreviate and capitalize Ph.D.:

walkingshadow: . . . this probably means i don't deserve one, doesn't it?
silentfire: i'd give you one if you wrote me fic
silentfire: it'd be a Ph.D. in AWESOME

d. my parents keep pushing my to edit the blog i kept in england for the purposes of paper publishing, and have redoubled their efforts since i've been home. i updated almost every day, often more than once a day: the sucker as it stands is 46,611 words. i'm thinking about it; i have absolutely no idea how it would work.

here's the thing: november is national novel-writing month. at the moment i have nothing more to say. i probably won't ever have anything more to say, but i give it a long look every year.

e. cousin m. and i had our last bellydancing class not last thursday but the thursday before, and i am not that sad to see it go. it was fun to do, but ultimately frustrating and unsatisfying: the instructor was a very nice lady and a fine dancer, but a nervous person and a horrible teacher. on the other hand, we've since had our first tai chi lesson and we love both it and the instructor. i'm sure that to call it chinese yoga is reductive and offensive to both the disciplines and their respective cultures of origin, but the similarities kept piling up in my head as he mentioned five principles in our first lesson: relaxation; keeping a straight back; breathing; twisting at the waist; and the circling of the hands. i don't know if he's making up his own list or what, but i can get behind it. also the massaging of the internal organs. class is held in a high-school cafeteria: i have to remember to bundle up for next tuesday. i.e. tomorrow.

f. my music purge is complete. the casualty rate was 13.5% (721 of 5,314), though i've added 250 songs just since i've been home from school. one of them was burn, baby, burn by the residents; you can download it there from fluxblog. i like to think of it as judges 11:30-40 (the god digs my daddy remix): jephthah made a vow that if god delivered his (jephthah's) enemies in battle, he would sacrifice the first person who came out of his house to meet him. fast forward to jephthah returning home from victory, when who should rush out to greet him but his daughter, his only child. and he was sad about it, you know, but a promise is a promise. the song is sung from the point of view of the daughter, about to die. it's creepy and cracktastic and i can't stop listening to it, but it's interesting, because the blame falls on god, when it seems like the fault is pretty clearly with the human element in this one.

g. television roundup:

kitchen confidential. i don't remember what i had to say about this one. maybe just that i still love it and am sad it's on hiatus. there's a fic community at [livejournal.com profile] greg_the_fish if you're interested in reading or writing. please be interested in writing, oh please.

grey's anatomy )

the west wing )

related )

h. my dad and i saw wallace and gromit )

and on saturday [livejournal.com profile] malelia_honu and i saw proof )

after the movie we went on a wild-goose chase looking for csi: miami dvds at first blockbuster and then (reluctantly) at wal-mart, but they were nowhere to be found; at least not at one a.m. it's just that what's one more spoiler-cut between friends? ) i didn't get in on the ground floor of any of the csis, i'm just going to have to start renting from the beginning. other shows i mean to get in on include arrested development and scrubs (saw the first season and nothing after); along with anything else you all think is worthwhile. my kingdom for a netflix subscription?

i. is for icon meme:

take a look at my icons. comment with the following:

1. one that makes you automatically think of me.
2. one that you think i should TOTALLY use more often.
3. one that you don't get/needs more explanation/you have no idea why the hell i have it.

comment using an icon of yours that you LOVE, and tell me why you picked THAT one too.
walkingshadow: anne taintor. it's not easy being easy. (Default)
You're not supposed to curse by an open window, right? At least, you're not supposed to do something by an open window. Whistle? Throw out the bathwater? Isn't there a proverb? I was in the Publix parking lot today, stopped in the middle of an aisle while someone pulled into a spot in front of me, and the guy behind me honked his horn. I checked the rearview mirror and said "fuck off, man" and then looked out my window, where this guy was just walking by and grinning at me. I jumped. "Not you, sir," I said, and I grinned back.

Watched Grey's Anatomy tonight and my, did a lot of things happen! A very happening episode. ) I watched Desperate Housewives too, but I was mostly keeping my mom company while I did the crossword (the Post's—I always let my mother have the Times). I've caught it a couple of times, but I've just never gotten into it. I don't really care enough to comment, except to say wow! is Teri Hatcher skinny. God knows they're all skinny, but I used to watch Lois and Clark, and I kept wincing every time I saw Susan in jeans.

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